What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
