Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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