would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
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