I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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