just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
