it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
