Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
We got so high we made milksteak
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
just found out that she named her cat after me.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
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