I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
