He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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