I can tuck mytits in my pants
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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