he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
