So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
