just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
