call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
