this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
