And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
