Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
