I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
