Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize