i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
