you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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