i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
