God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
