How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
