Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
