i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
You were trust falling into bushes
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Randomize
