She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
The struggles of a small town man whore
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
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