Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
