Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
That accounts for only three of the penises
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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