question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
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