i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
