I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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