why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
