Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Let's paint friendship bongs
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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