There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Randomize
