David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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