I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
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