no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
