The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
