He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
