Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
