Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Randomize
