i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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