those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize