For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize