The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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