one might say we're banned from that church
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
