I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize