Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
My liver just had a heart attack.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Randomize
