you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
