Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Randomize
